"AFK Journey Rap" lyrics

I know honest work is hard
I do mine idly
For in my heart I am no idol of society
Don't you wish more crimes were normalized
No batting eyes to see
Oh, how I'd love to lead a life more piratey

Where there be beefing factions who's acting first
'Cause our fleet confers
With a lack of words
Long as we got cash, we'll forget we're cursed
So, if your purse is leaky, call my bag secured

Sea legs stand firm on this turf of ours
The streets of Rustport is for the sharks
I'm in a cutthroat crew
And I've earned my scars upon the learning curve like a character with arc

Up out the grave reborn
Call it my journey's start
Don't have a life no more
So, I'll make Merlin's hard
We never rest ashore 'til there's an X to mark
Plenty of wealth to horde with which we'll never part

Oh, captain, thank ye for the generous raise
Yes. I meant from the grave but also what of my wages, please
We have mastered the sea forming more than waves
And our war don't end, even when you're away
AFK

Pick your support and tank
Healer and DPS
Better make sure they slay
You don't know port from starboard
You'll be shortly sank

After we make sore with a few swordly spanks
Careful. A storm's brewing. Treachery is afoot
Already know what I'm doing
I'll let the mutiny cook
Light bearers, are you scared?
You should fear us all
'Cause we're your nightmare
What you need's a miracle

What's Kraken
Promise, I'm not gonna bite unless you try to get past me and my water wights
I'll never get back-stabbed again and that's on God
Any time, any place. You better be on guard

I put jaws to the floor, if fools cross my sword
But when Hodgkin's not watching, I'm up to more
'Cause orphans know no one else is going to save you
Hey, captain, that guy was about to betray you

Hold up. Wait
Did ya'll finally reach a verdict?
I know you think I know boing when I took a look at Merlin
But I'll always rock the crew
Screw the dead-tide fleet
I don't wanna walk the plank and make the tide red

Oh, my God! There they go
Left me right in the ocean
Where's my boy viperian?
I need one hell of a potion
Thought if I could infiltrate them, opportunity'd open
Then I'd finally see captain Hodgkin chocking

That's OK
Guess I'll hitch a ride to the dark forest
Hey, Sinbad, have you heard the news?
I'm important
Been recorded from port to port
Rapport with hordes of lords
And now I'm linking with carmine
So, climb aboard

What's that?
You don't like me?
Put down your rum and sword and come fight me

Let's have a tavern brawl
Think you're mighty
I get more piratey
When I'm hyphy

Now, I'm cracking the whip
Go tell your girl Sonya, I'll be back in a jiff
But now it's time to set sail and I'm A-OK
'Cause dead men tell no tales
When they're AFK

AFK
I'm 'a need a page essay
Write the reasons why you shouldn't walk the plank
They say head case, but I just gotta slay dead weight
And when they said they had hands, did they say AKs?

Line the hull with doubters
Let me show them power
All the rows of cowards
Get the souls devoured
Then it's off of the boat
I let 'em float
With flounders
Then I bring 'em all back
So, they can fold my trousers

Better fortify your britches
They all mortified to witness
You can end up with the fishes
If you glorify the riches
Unless you join me, then the storyline is shifted
We be on the high seas and the touring guide is vicious me
So, go ahead and get the bed-side seat
You gotta be so dull to try to bread-knife me
If you back-stab, I'm 'a make your neck line leak
And now you're just another member of the dead-tide fleet