"Becoming Unbecoming" lyrics

Googled community colleges
And then outpatient treatment centers
I made a pros and cons list
Weighing which one will fix me better
And my dad got sober but we still don't talk
And I haven't read all those books I bought
And I'm not gonna do it
Just gonna think about it a lot

Found a gray hair in the sink
And then put One Direction on
I can't accept the inevitable
Unless I'm listening to their songs
And my girlhood spent crying over jeans
And the boys I liked that didn't like me
And thinking I was broken
When I was actually just fifteen

Reinvention, superstition
In his image, new beginnings
Always scared of something
Becoming unbecoming
Georgia peaches, farthest reaches
Student turns into the teacher
Always scared of something
Becoming unbecoming

I was there when all all the plans were made
But I wasn't invited to them
Started talking to myself
I made an imaginary friend
Everything changed when my favorite dog died
And I got my heart broken for the first time
He did it on a Wednesday
He did it on a school night

Reinvention, superstition
In his image, new beginnings
Always scared of something
Becoming unbecoming
Georgia peaches, farthest reaches
Student turns into the teacher
Always scared of something
Becoming unbecoming

They used to call me smart
Call me bright, call me gifted
And a part of me took pride
In reading faster than other kids did
'Cause when things were standardized
And I was timed, and I was tested
Then I could prove that I was worthy of love and attention
Now I'm no longer smart
No longer bright, no longer gifted
And I can't read anything
If it takes me longer than fifteen minutes
Yet I still scrape and search
And crave to earn that validation
I'm becoming unbecoming
I'm not special, never have been

Reinvention, superstition
In his image, new beginnings
Always scared of something
Becoming unbecoming
Georgia peaches, farthest reaches
Student turns into the teacher
Always scared of something
Becoming unbecoming