"Eight Nights A Week" lyrics

Shall I sing you a song about something
Something about which I don't know much
Because I'm a third
A numeral not a word
Singing 'bout hanukkah might be faux

See, Irving Berlin wrote about Christmas
And wrote "God Bless America" too
Irv had some nerve
He could take a swerve
Pretty good for a short Russian Jew

And it all seems to be about oil
Makin' eight nights a week from just one
Like the fishes and loaves
So on Tuesday let shrove know
There's not much new under the sun

Hey, I know hanukkah is the fun one
You've got your dreidls, your latkes, and your song
Unlike Yom Kipper
When you zip up your zipper
In atonement for all you've done wrong

Atone awhile!
Zip that thing, boy!
Fresh hot latkes yum, yum, yum

In my lobby they light the menorah
But folks still got to move their parked cars
Surely God intended
Restrictions suspended
Last [?] manmade rules are from Mars

Christmas morning kids open their presents
Loot piled up under a lit tree
But Jewish kids can't peak
For their eight nights a week
That seems less fraught and more fun to me

Hey, shall I sing you a song about something
Something about which I don't know
Because I'm a third
A numeral not a word
Singing about Hanukkah might be faux
Hanukkah might just be a no-go