"i shouldn't be here" lyrics

I always thought that I'd find peace in never being
Awake long enough to feel anything
I wouldn't venture past the edge of listening
'Cause there was nothing to the table I could bring

And it gets harder to conceal it as the evenings pass
That every moment of this year competes to be my last
But when I'm feeling myself fall
You're tightening your grasp, oh oh

Oh, I shouldn't be here
The things I've put you through
There's nothing without you
Oh, I shouldn't be here
The things I've made you lose
I'm nothing without you

I wish you didn't have the strength to carry me
I know it's hard to watch me walk unsteadily
I'd understand if I'm not where you want home to be
You shouldn't have to be afraid every time you leave

And it gets harder to believe it as the evenings pass
That we're now half way through the year
And on my feet I stand
I think there's something in me still
That let's you pull me back, oh oh

Oh, I shouldn't be here
The things I've put you through
There's nothing without you
Oh, I shouldn't be here
The things I've made you lose
I'm nothing without you

You follow me into the night
Just so I can see the sun rise
I know you always seem to be alright, oh oh
I promise you that I will find
A way to give you peace of mind
So please hold on for another while

Oh, I shouldn't be here
The things I've put you through
I'm nothing without you