"#SELFIE (Parody)" lyrics
(originally by The Chainsmokers)
[Stefan:]
Oh my God, that was, like, totally off the chain
Totes wanna go three more times
It's like a scene from 50 Shades of Slave, or whatever
It's just how I imagined doing it with your dad, but younger
I love your beard, #hipster
Your breath kind of smells like carrots, but I love it, #carrotbreath
You just like, do whatever you do and wear whatever you wear
You look like shit, but I love it
My va-jay-jay is totally run down right now
And I'm feeling kind of fat
Do you think I'm fat?
You're fat
I like, always imagined my first baby would be Chinese
They're like, so much cuter
Wait, I think the condom broke
And I'm worried I'm pregnant
I should take a test
But first, let me take an after-sex selfie
[Dru:]
Oh my God, we should totally have sex
Oh wait, we are?
My friends say I'm a slut, because one time, I let five guys in at once
But I was in Thailand, and I was discovering myself, #gapyear
Wait, this is so embarrassing
But I like, totally just came on my period, and I need to get a tampon
But first, let me take an after-sex selfie
[Ash:]
Oh my God, I am like, the Jesus of blowjobs, #biblical
Can't believe Bunty passed me a joint tonight, her dress was butters
I've got the munchies
Fucking wish I had a pug
Think I'm gonna cry, #dorbs
Look, I've fucked a lot of guys
That sounds really slutty, but it's not
Mate, you should slap my bum and Vine it, totes kinky
Oh wait, that's gross
Do it now
People always think I'm Jessica Alba's sister
It's so annoying
I swear to God, Lana Del Rey is the soundtrack to my life
Hold the phone
Bunty just posted an after-sex selfie
Skank, whore
That is so cringe
Bitch, tramp
Who even takes an after-sex selfie?
That is so tragic
Fake tan's the most offensive thing in the world
I'm going to report it, but first
Let me take an after-sex selfie
Oh my God, that was, like, totally off the chain
Totes wanna go three more times
It's like a scene from 50 Shades of Slave, or whatever
It's just how I imagined doing it with your dad, but younger
I love your beard, #hipster
Your breath kind of smells like carrots, but I love it, #carrotbreath
You just like, do whatever you do and wear whatever you wear
You look like shit, but I love it
My va-jay-jay is totally run down right now
And I'm feeling kind of fat
Do you think I'm fat?
You're fat
I like, always imagined my first baby would be Chinese
They're like, so much cuter
Wait, I think the condom broke
And I'm worried I'm pregnant
I should take a test
But first, let me take an after-sex selfie
[Dru:]
Oh my God, we should totally have sex
Oh wait, we are?
My friends say I'm a slut, because one time, I let five guys in at once
But I was in Thailand, and I was discovering myself, #gapyear
Wait, this is so embarrassing
But I like, totally just came on my period, and I need to get a tampon
But first, let me take an after-sex selfie
[Ash:]
Oh my God, I am like, the Jesus of blowjobs, #biblical
Can't believe Bunty passed me a joint tonight, her dress was butters
I've got the munchies
Fucking wish I had a pug
Think I'm gonna cry, #dorbs
Look, I've fucked a lot of guys
That sounds really slutty, but it's not
Mate, you should slap my bum and Vine it, totes kinky
Oh wait, that's gross
Do it now
People always think I'm Jessica Alba's sister
It's so annoying
I swear to God, Lana Del Rey is the soundtrack to my life
Hold the phone
Bunty just posted an after-sex selfie
Skank, whore
That is so cringe
Bitch, tramp
Who even takes an after-sex selfie?
That is so tragic
Fake tan's the most offensive thing in the world
I'm going to report it, but first
Let me take an after-sex selfie
Writer(s): Andrew Taggart
