"act" lyrics

I follow where my heart leads, sometimes that's all I know
Then I end up defeated when I lose all self-control
But I'm not the villain, and I'm not the good guy either
If I'm such a problem, why'd you let me keep her?

Last night I was fucking it up
I can't lie, I kept refiling my cup
And though I know I shouldn't ever wanna drink like that
I have a couple issues that I got from dad, so
I've tried to end it all and finally feel the repercussion
I know that it's stupid, all the memories would be for nothing
You should meet a better guy, you should probably dip
You should probably split, nothing's what you thought it is
If you need some peace of mind, I can let you go
God knows, girl, yeah I'm such a fucking joke
If you see me doing fine, it's another act
I'm an addict, not an artist, never take me back
If I see another day, it's another bit
I'm just tryna make you smile, ain't it obvious?

I've set my standards so damn high
I don't know if I'll make it out this time
I wanna tell you I've healed and I'm fine
But everyone knows that's a lie

I follow where my heart leads, sometimes that's all I know
Then I end up defeated when I lose all self-control
But I'm not the villain, and I'm not the good guy either
If I'm such a problem, why'd you let me keep her?