"Sorry To Myself" lyrics

I'm sorry to myself
I'm sorry to myself, myself

I'm tired of blaming everybody else
When I should be blaming myself
When I lit the match, that turned my life into a hell
But this time I don't wanna yell
I tried to save them, but I end up being left in the dust
Sacrifices made for us
I ignored all your red flags so now my heart sits on a crutch
Guess I was desperate for love
Sick of being numb
Sick of comparing myself to the person I was
I hate who I am, hate who I become
Laying in my bed and it's hard to get up
Cuz I'm feeling fed up
I'm tired of all of this pressure that keeps coming down on me
Nobody in my life says that they're proud of me
I feel depressed, they say I'm not allowed to be, damn
Money doesn't fix the problem
I constantly feel like I'm drowning
My confidence tanked, I allowed it
These fakes love to claim that they're about it
I avoid them, I can't be around them
Can't count on no one, I'll be honest
Cuz all of my scars and my traumas
It's hard for me to see the option
Where I can trust people so I just
Rather stay to myself, I do this shit often
This shit is exhausting (exhausting me)
Hate myself, hate myself
Blame myself, blame myself
I'm stuck in this infinite loop
Go through this always so this isn't new
I'm tryna get through, fighting to change
I'm getting sick cuz I'm stuck in my ways
And times going fast, months passing like days
I feel like the black sheep breaking out the matrix
Televised lies got me feeling hella anxious
I'm tryna save lives, y'all tryna get famous
I'm tryna find god, he's the one that can save us
He gave me a sign and I went and ignored it
Now I feel depressed and bask in my misfortunes
I'm hoping that I escape this
Hate the misery I stay with, I'm (Yeah e yeah)

I'm sorry to myself (I'm sorry to myself)
I'm sorry to myself (I'm sorry yeah)
I'm sorry to myself
Myself

Cuz I can't let go of this
Cuz I'm falling into deep
And it feels like my life's is just falling apart
Falling apart