"ATTENTION BY DESIGN" lyrics

Attention by design

Anxious and bored
I'm so invisible
Where the fuck's my award
For my sadness and trouble?

Maybe I should take a pic
Make it seem like I am sick
Post it and get high off of the clicks

I'm sad, mad
And no one cares
A stranger's life is on the line
But what about me?
It's a shame
They can't see how bad I ache
And crave attention by design
If I'm not hurt enough
I guess I'll work on it
And next time I'll look weaker than when I was on drugs

My mom overdosed when I was 9
Maybe I should post about it?
My dad was never there for me, never there when I cried
Maybe I should post about it?
Now I'm almost 30, self diagnosed with PTSD
I should post about it
I wanna be a part of the trend
'Cause now I understand
I'm nothing if I don't feel pain
I'm nothing if I'm not insane
I'm nothing if I don't have fame

I'm sad, mad
And no one cares
A stranger's life is on the line
But what about me?
It's a shame
They can't see how bad I ache
And crave attention by design
If I'm not hurt enough
I guess I'll work on it
And next time I'll look weaker than when I was on drugs

I feel like a ghost
I bleed the most
But nobody knows

I'm sad, mad
And no one cares
A stranger's life is on the line
But what about me?
It's a shame
They can't see how bad I ache
And crave attention by design
If I'm not hurt enough
I guess I'll work on it
And next time I'll say that I wanna kill myself