"Jesus Never Had No Porno" lyrics

Jesus never had no porno
Jesus never had cocaine
Jesus never had Ibiza
He never even went to Spain
Jesus never had no Big Mac
He had no coital shame
He never had 9/11
He never even saw no plane

But every time he spoke
The people gathered 'round
When he washed their feet
The demons all came out
So when's he gonna come again?

Jesus never had no doctor
He never had COVID-19
He never voted for Obama
And he never had no vaccine
Jesus couldn't hear no single
His vibe was too surreal
And Jesus couldn't pump those numbers
So Jesus never got no deal

But every time he sang
The people gathered 'round
From Sodom to L.A.
To hear that funky sound
So when's he gonna twist again?

Like we did last summer
Like we did last summer
Like we did last summer

Where is Jesus?
He just dog up and left