"Ghost" lyrics

I tried it once before but I didn't get too far
I felt a lot of pain but it didn't stop my heart
And all I really wanted was someone to give a little fuck
But I waited there forever and nobody even looked up

I tried it once before and I think I might've messed up
I struggled with the veins and I guess I didn't bleed enough
But maybe I'm alive 'cause I didn't really wanna die
But nothing very special ever happens in my life

Take the blade away from me
I am a freak, I am afraid that
All the blood escaping me won't end the pain
And I'll be haunting all the lives that cared for me
I died to be the white ghost
Of the man that I was meant to be

I tried it like before and this time I made a deep cut
I thought about my friends and the way I didn't give enough
And I should've told my mother 'mom, I love you' like a good son
But this life is overwhelming and I'm ready for the next one

Take the blade away from me
I am a freak, I am afraid that
All the blood escaping me won't end the pain
And I'll be haunting all the lives that cared for me
I died to be the white ghost
Of the man that I was meant to be, yeah

I tried it once again and I think I might black out
I should've left a letter but I had nothing to write about
My blood is all around me, I get dizzy if I stand up
The cutting part was easy but regretting it is so fucked

Take the blade away from me
I am a freak, I am afraid that
All the blood escaping me won't end the pain
And I'll be haunting all the lives that cared for me
I died to be the white ghost
Of the man that I was meant to be

I tried it once again and I think I went too far
The man that I was meant to be
I cut a little deeper and the pressure stopped my heart
The man that I was meant to be
I could've told my mother that I love her, I'm a bad son
This life is overwhelming and I'm ready for the next one