"If A Girl Isn't Pretty" lyrics
(from "Funny Girl" soundtrack)
If a girl isn't pretty
Like a Miss Atlantic City
All she gets from life is pity and a pat
Kindly name a star who hasn't won a contest or a pageant
If she hasn't, she just never gets to bat
She must shine in ev'ry detail
Like a ring you buy in retail
Be a standard size that fits a standard dress
When a girl's incidentals
Are no bigger than two lentils
Then to me it doesn't spell success
Frumpy faces that could cause ya
To have temporary nausea
Do I have to hear a lecture such as that?
Is a nose with deviation
Such a crime against the nation?
Should I throw her into jail or drown the cat?
So she looks a bit off balance
She possesses golden talents
Or is that a pill too bitter to digest?
Oh, she's got very nice deportment
Hmm, but when they see that assortment
From the gallery they'll be throwing fruit
Like a Miss Atlantic City
All she gets from life is pity and a pat
Kindly name a star who hasn't won a contest or a pageant
If she hasn't, she just never gets to bat
She must shine in ev'ry detail
Like a ring you buy in retail
Be a standard size that fits a standard dress
When a girl's incidentals
Are no bigger than two lentils
Then to me it doesn't spell success
Frumpy faces that could cause ya
To have temporary nausea
Do I have to hear a lecture such as that?
Is a nose with deviation
Such a crime against the nation?
Should I throw her into jail or drown the cat?
So she looks a bit off balance
She possesses golden talents
Or is that a pill too bitter to digest?
Oh, she's got very nice deportment
Hmm, but when they see that assortment
From the gallery they'll be throwing fruit
Writer(s): Jule Styne, Bob Merrill
