"Hurting My Own Feelings" lyrics

I have a tendency to be kinda mean to myself, oh I do it well, I kind of excel
I paid for therapy like sanity's something to sell
Oh an hour of hell just for them tell me
That I get a good thing and look for the bad bits
I get addicted to self sabotage and I know it's not healthy
It won't help me but I just can't stop

Hurting my own feelings
I could be happy but I'm
Hurting my own feelings
Been making a habit of it
Why does my head
Choose violence?
Overthink into a
Worst case spiral
Hurting my own feelings
Over and over and over

I think I could've been a detective in another life
I wish I could fight it (wish I could fight it)
But every night I'm
Knee deep in memories that I never wanted to find thinking how good your ex looked in 2019
Is there a rehab for stopping the toxic?
Finding a red flag and running towards it
Knowing it's not healthy, it won't help me
But I just can't stop

Hurting my own feelings
I could be happy but I'm
Hurting my own feelings
Been making a habit of it
Why does my head
Choose violence?
Overthink into a
Worst case spiral
Hurting my own feelings
Over and over and over

I might be a massochist
But I wanna know every person you've kissed, were they attractive?
I'm only asking so I can compare myself to them
Feel like a loser don't know why I do this its true I'm

Hurting my own feelings
I could be happy but I'm
Hurting my own feelings
Been making a habit of it
Why does my head
Choose violence?
Overthink into a
Worst case spiral
Hurting my own feelings
Over and over and over again