"No Spine" lyrics

So, stay
You know you're right where you belong
I think it's sad you only focus on the times that we aren't getting along
I said I loved you
You know some things will never change
I'll always love your taste
Hope I suffocate, risking my life in between your legs
But I've got no spine

I seem to get lost in the sweet taste of your lips
And watch you take control with the movement of your hips

I admit it's confusing
That's not what was said
What came out, less intrusive than what's in my head
We both know that I've said some shit that won't just fade
Well, love me anyway

Yea, maybe it's the way I'm wired
I'll tell you what you want to hear
And I think I'm afraid that we won't see better days
If we carry on in fear
And I'm tired as hell from laying all the blame on myself
It's just too much to bear
When I really need to think of myself
But what I think of myself is what's keeping me down here

Ever changing
I'd like to settle on a version of myself my wife could handle
And I don't pray much these days
I'm a lifetime away from begging God for his grace
I still believe in something larger than me
But I feel the weight compressing my faith
It's a hard pill to swallow, between a rock and a hard rock place

Am I worth this pain?
Am I worth the strain to you?