"Desperado" lyrics

Am I in God's hands or God damned? Or is failure just part of God's plan? I've done things even I don't understand. They can write it on my grave, I'm a wicked wicked man, trying to stand in this hellfire head high, tell the Devil he's a fucking liar. I can't cry as I bleed under dark skies, trying to find resolution down the barrel of a 45. Why was I born in the first place? Such a waste, to give a man a talent for a dream he'll never taste. I embrace what the Bible says, but in my head it's hard telling myself I ain't better off dead. I'm a madman, kicking rocks through the badlands, hugging a nickel plated 44 magnum. The last thing I dreamed of being was a bad man, but my plans ain't pan now here I am. I'm walking through a tar pit with a target painted on my back, back to where I started... Watching the world throw stones again like I'm the only man ever to sin. I put it on my kids as my witness, I'm too far gone for forgiveness. So in the end what the point of repentance? Because the Devil and the world and the church ain't letting me forget this!

I'm walking down this lonely road of sin... I'm a Desperado.

Am I in God's hands or God damned? Or is failure part of being a man? Overcome by the sin of my hands, I'm on my knees praying maybe God still has a plan, for a lowlife doing wrong like I don't know right. Stuck up in the middle of a Devil-God-Job fight. What's black? What's gray? What's white? I can't even tell no more but I know what it's like to lose your wife and kids... everything that you love because everything that you loved wasn't never enough. Cuz you took it for granted, couldn't picture the day when everything you worked to build starts slipping away. Once the hurt that you've caused outweighs the hurt that you've done and you're a shame as a father, a husband, a son. When you're a shame as a believer, a shame as a man, when shame is all you really got left in your hands. When you battle your thoughts while the heart forsakes you, and you battle your mind while your family hates you. When you battle the Devil on the road he takes you and you battle with the Lord while He's working to break you. My own kids as my witness, if I'm too far gone for forgiveness then in the end what's the motherfucking difference between a sinner and the lost and a man that calls himself religious?

I'm walking down this lonely road of sin... I'm a Desperado.

I'm walking down this lonely road of sin... I'm a Desperado. I bet my soul on a bad hand, threw the dice to the wind, now I'm just another bad man payin' heavy for my sins.