"I, Lament" lyrics

To the ones who held me down when I was not around to show up for myself
To give respect and put my ass in check when I put responsibility on the shelf
All the wasted time while I was blowing lines
Everyday a death wish
Staying up 'til 5 I was barely alive
Coming home and met with a kiss

With all due respect
I apologize
Couldn't see my wrongs through blood stained eyes

With all due respect
I didn't realize
Couldn't see my wrongs through blood stained eyes

So here we go, again and again
I lost you as a lover, but I found you as a friend
Your labor unpaid, I have nothing to give
You saw the best in me when I did not want to live
Your heart was warm and welcome
My heart was cold and gray
I couldn't let you leave this life
Without hearing me say
I apologize

I look back, in retrospect, take a deep breath and reflect
And I'm ashamed of what I discovered
The way I treated myself and the way I treat others