"joel" lyrics

It just hasn't feel the same, the same way it used to, no
I suppose that that's just something I've just gotta get used to now
Close my eyes and do whatever I imagine that you do, but I
I'm not sure, I'm not sure

Because everybody's happy and with everybody laughing
I can't help feeling like I abandoned you
I wish I could've gone instead of you
It sounds a bit macabre 'cause it's true
'Cause there's a certain pain in everything I do

Someone told me let the pain go
Almost punched him in his face though
If I let go of the pain, I might cease to know your name
It's been so damn long
I can picture your face, I've been so damn wrong
In so many ways
I've been holding on
That will never change, it's all for you

Because everybody's happy and with everybody laughing
I can't help feeling like I abandoned you
I wish I could've gone instead of you
It sounds a bit macabre 'cause it's true
'Cause there's a certain pain in everything I do

But I don't like to talk about it
Everyone tip-toes around it
Feels like they're tip-toeing 'round you
All I ever really know is
All I ever really know is
It's all for you, you, you, you