"Final Debate Songified" lyrics

Tonight we witness the final contest -
Two men enter and two men shall leave
But each must answer now my questions three - yeah!

Preekotos omnipitos romneytos schieffertos freetos obamatos

How could we ship jobs to Shanghai
When America invented the chicken pot pie

We have brought cases against China for violating trade rules
We are going to insist that China plays by the same rules

They're hacking into our computers
Counterfeiting our goods, stealing our intellectual property
Our patents, our designs (okay!)

China's a potential partner if it's following the rules

We wanted to trade with them
But you gotta play by the rules

Now that we're finally bringing troops home
Won't the Afghans be lonely when they're all alone

When Afghans are perfectly capable of defending their own country (yeah,)
There's no reason why Americans should die

The Taliban they're gonna come rushing back in when we go (uhhuh)
The Afghan forces have to be able to provide securitay

(Preekotos omnipitos romneytos schieffertos freetos obamatos)
Why should you run the show
We decimated Al-Qaeda's core
Tell us 'cause we need to know
I want to bring jobs back to our shores
(Preekotos omnipitos romneytos schieffertos freetos obamatos)
Two more weeks until we vote
We need to have strong allies
Who can really run the show
My strategy's to go after the bad guys

Is the threat from Iran getting overblown?
Or should I use my Xbox to bomb them with drones?

Their economy is in shambles
We organized the strongest sanctions in history

Crippling sanctions do work
You're seeing it now

I'm glad Romney agrees
They wanna see Israel wiped off the map

If Israel's attacked, we have their back

Israel's a true friend
America will stand with them

Should we increase our military size
So we can keep killing every single bad guy

Our navy is smaller now than any time since 1917
I want to make sure that we have the ships
That are required by our navy

You mentioned that we have fewer ships
We also have fewer horses and bayonets
Because our military's changed

(Preekotos omnipitos romneytos schieffertos freetos obamatos)
Why should you run the show
We decimated Al-Qaeda's core
Tell us 'cause we need to know
I want to bring jobs back to our shores
(Preekotos omnipitos romneytos schieffertos freetos obamatos)
Two more weeks until we vote
We need to have strong allies
Who can really run the show
My strategy's to go after the bad guys
Whoo!

Thank you

Thank you so much

That's all folks
Schieffer out, now I'm 'bout to go home
Been a long day, so it's time to get my drank on
Ninety minutes I've been spittin' bout our foreign policy
Ninety minutes I'll be sippin' on a glass of Hennessy
Let me leave you with a thought from my mom
Go out and vote, makes you feel big and strong