"Murphy's Law" lyrics

Mercury must be in retrograde
Nothing lately has gone my way
My life's on fire
I'm getting tired
They say that bad things come in threes
But how come it's dozens when it's me?
Every day is harder
Sanity seems farther

Woke up late
Lost my phone
Tried to call it
Dial tone
Outta gas
Tire's blown
Typical
I'm alone

There goes Murphy's Law
Tell me where did I go wrong?
Keeping calm to carry on
Lifelines blurry in my palm
Down to my last straw
Picking at my every flaw
Wish I had a crystal ball
But I guess that's just Murphy's Law
Guess that's just Murphy's Law

The internet poisoned my brain
Washed my standards down the drain
Plug me in and rewire
I'm preaching to choir
Cause I'm not the way I used to be
Doused my old self in gasoline
Killed my desire
That girl expired

Woke up late
Lost my phone
Tried to call it
Dial tone
What's the worst that could happen
Anything you'd imagine

There goes Murphy's Law
Tell me where did I go wrong?
Keeping calm carry on
Lifelines blurry in my palm
Down to my last straw
Picking at my every flaw
Wish I had a crystal ball
But I guess that's just Murphy's Law

Talk it through to feel it out
Yeah that's the only way I know how
I'm human confusion
Nothing is as soothing
As thinking later and speaking now
Secrets sneak their way through my mouth
I know what I'm doing
I'm always picking and choosin'

What's the worst that could happen?
Anything you'd imagine

There goes Murphy's Law
Tell me where did I go wrong?
What's the worst that could happen?
Anything you'd imagine
What's the worst? What's the worst?
What's the worst that could happen?
What's the worst? What's the worst?
What's the worst that could happen?!