"Gloss" lyrics

I'd like to see my face on a glossy page
Where they dress me up in several different ways
And I'll own a place out in London, babe
With the closet full of garments I've never paid for
And no I never steal
Most were gifts I've acquired being relatively still
And I'm with my love, we watch foreign films
Or it's early morning and we're dancing in our feels

I cannot control it all
When I [?] with all I'm worth
As I lay in grace I know
It's more than I deserve

Mourning for many more moments like this
I've been searching for any short moment of bliss
I can't stay in this place knowing solace exists
And we're far from it
Always overcast, let the smoke amass
With our hands behind our heads and blades of grass
Feel my face relax as you take my hand
Can you hold me till my eyelids fade to black?
Whoa, I'm back inside my home
The one where I grew up and wrote the song about [?]
Who are you my love, I don't even know
I just hope I find you because I hate being alone

I cannot control it all
When I [?] with all I'm worth
As I lay in grace I know
It's more than I deserve