"Whiskey Tango Foxtrot" lyrics

Got off late, was trying to get off early
Old lady at the lot just flipped me the birdie
I got pulled over 'cause I was in a hurry
Well thanks a lot officer, good day, just great
And now I'm later than I was
And all I really wanted was to catch me a buzz
I finally got there but somebody's in my chair
I'm doing my best trying not swear, but—

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
Why the hell not say what I'm thinking
'Cause when I'm drinking it's hard to stop once I start
Like the guy next to me talking off my ear
Thought I just came in here to have a cold beer
But guess what? It's not, it's hot
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

Well my ex walks in with her new boyfriend
And let's just say it wasn't a happy ending
I take it as a sign for me to leave
But I can't find my keys, jeez

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
Why the hell not say what I'm thinking
'Cause when I'm drinking it's hard to stop once I start
Like the guy next to me talking off my ear
Thought I just came in here to have a cold beer
And unwind till closing time but my card's declined
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

I walk outside to my truck
The keys were locked inside
Just my luck
What the—

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
Why the hell not say what I'm thinking
'Cause when I'm drinking it's hard to stop once I start
Like the guy next to me talking off my ear
Thought I just came in here to have a cold beer
But guess what? It's not, it's hot
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot