"The Bartender" lyrics

Clink, clink, clink
Can I get you another drink?
Something sweet, something pink
Something tall, something strong
Buzz, buzz, buzz
Spilling tea just because
You had just one too much
Alc-ee-hol and Pall Mall

No, I ain't gonna judge ya
If you wanna have, wanna have another
If you wanna kiss your ex's brother
No, I don't think it's wrong

I'm the best kind of friend
'Cause I don't give a damn
If you're leaving here with him or her
No, I dont curr
I'm your local therapist
With a zipper on my lips
All the crimes you commit
Don't exist, it's a blur
I promise you, honey, I won't remember
As long as you tip the, ooh, bartender

Billy came with Suzy
But made a pass at Lucy
It's 'bout to be a doozy
It's a brawl, Lord, it's on
Tequila's got him brave
Drinking like it's a race
Saying things he shouldn't say
Cut him off, get him gone

Yeah, the bouncer's at the door
Two-timing, two-stepping on the floor
You can always have just one more
And I'll just play along

I'm the best kind of friend
'Cause I don't give a damn
If you're leaving here with him or her
No, I dont curr
I'm your local therapist
With a zipper on my lips
All the crimes you commit
Don't exist, it's a blur
I promise you, honey, I won't remember
As long as you tip the, ooh, bartender

I'll pour you one if you tell me one
I'll drink it down
I'll pour you two if you tell me who
I know that's true
I'll pour you three if you wanna see
Where the night could lead
Belly up to the bar
Just come and sit with me

I'm the best kind of friend
'Cause I don't give a damn
If you're leaving here with him or her
No, I dont curr
I'm your local therapist
With a zipper on my lips
All the crimes you commit
Don't exist, it's a blur
I promise you, honey, I won't remember
As long as you tip the, ooh, bartender

(I'll pour you one)
(I'll pour you two)
(I'll pour you three)