"Strange Day" lyrics

Strange day. Strange day. Strange day in Hogsville, U.S.A.

I remember when I rode into town that morning in December of forty-eight
Oh, bitter cold. I had on my parka, my sheepskin coat and my brown and white spectator pumps
Cut quite a figure if I do say so. Huh, cute
First thing I spied was a poster. There's going to be a dance
The second Hogsville dandy-steppin' ball and frog happin; contest. Drag

Strange day. Strange day. Strange day in Hogsville, U.S.A.

I'm goin' to start off but there weren't no lady folk in sight
I figured they was all up a-primpin' for the dance and being a man of no small charms with the ladies myself
I decided to park Old Paint and change my socks - from him to me
(I find that extremely offensive!) So did Old Paint

But there were no gals for miles around, not one gal in the whole darn town
So, if you want to go dancin', just look around for the next best thing that can be found

Strange day. Strange day. Strange day in Hogsville, U.S.A.

That's right. I soon found there wasn't no women nowhere
Fellows goin' to the dance was takin' some of the strangest things
One was takin' a broom, all dressed up in a pinafore, bleached straws, looked kinda cheap to me
Another was totin' a picture of a girl
He'd been goin' with that picture so long he thought real girls folded in the middle
Now I was getting depressed, but then I spied the cutest little thing you ever saw
Givin' me the eye from underneath the waterin' trough
Had little eyes, curly tail, and the dearest little pointed ears you ever seen
I grabbed her paw (What'd her paw have to say? Shut up when he's a-talkin'!)
And we wobbled into the dance. The minute we get into the dance the music stopped and a feller said
"Wait a minute! That's the sheriff's gal!" (You mean?)

Strange day. Strange day. Strange day in Hogsville
(You know, I can still hear the little critter) U.S.A!