"The Shades" lyrics

Where the hell did soul go?
I am not the logo
Been here too long and I'm going home
Airplane mode, better hold the phone, better hold the phone
I woke up this morning, I looked in the mirror
Cold feet on the tile, how the hell am I here?
Lost track of the moment, barely remember the year
Is this a higher calling or just a career?
Oh God, I'm lost, my bad, my fault
And "I'm sorry" doesn't cover all the pain that I've caused
Just wanna love myself, not codependent on applause
Just wanna run myself, not codependent on applause

I don't wanna go to work, nah
I just wanna play
I just wanna stay in bed
And watch life through the shades
Through the shade
I just wanna feel better, feel better
And I don't wanna wait, no
I just wanna be happy, man
Man, I'll open up the shades
Open up the shades, open up the shades

I wish that taro cards would tell me my future
They say faith is good only if you use it
My uncle's kidneys failed when he got out the hospital
But he stayed drunkaholic, he just couldn't get off that bottle
Couldn't get off that bottle
I went to the casino, swore I ain't going back
The next day, went to the ATM and bet it on black
I spun the roulette wheel and I felt it all start to crash
Playing cards with the Devil, we all know the dealer wins that
I got too much bad karma, yeah, I shoulda saved up
Got kicked off that ladder I was finally getting praise from
A chance to see how we react when God decides to break us
Once you pick the pieces up, well then it's time to make something
I wanna get high, just wanna stay up
Chipped my teeth on the curb
Fight, fuck and make up
Wanna escape my mind, these thoughts need vacations
And girl, you look good, but you'd look better in Jamaica

I don't wanna go to work, nah
I just wanna play
I just wanna stay in bed
And watch life through the shades
Through the shade
I just wanna feel better, feel better
And I don't wanna wait, no
I just wanna be happy, man
Man, I'll open up the shades
Open up the shades, open up the shades