"Things I Carry" lyrics

I'm scared that from this moment on everything will go dark
I'm scared you're getting older and I'm scared I left a mark
I'm scared of journal pages, I tape together for my own good
The knife, the wine, the closet
My twelve pound head, that shameful look

Sip me down with dinner like the poison in your drink
Then throw me up like liquor in someone you don't know's sink
Hold me up so I can see the tip tops of the trees
All the things I carry, now I'll let them carry me

I'm scared that if I heal from you, you won't be mine to keep
I'm scared I'm only livin' for what's long been dead to me
I'm scared I don't know how to sing without a broken heart
The bluejay at my window, my shaky hands, a rotten start

Sit me down and tell me the worst news I've ever heard
Break my bones in places, that have yet to know real hurt
Hold me up so I can see the tip tops of the trees
All the things I carry, now I'll let them carry me