"One Winged Office: A Sephiroth Song" lyrics

Monday! 6AM!
Running late for work again!
Be there 7:10!
Down a mocha-latte blend!

TRAFFIC JAM!
RED LIGHT CAM!

Spreadsheets! Use Excel!
They won't open; they're from Hell
Mouse won't work as well!
Clearly this was made by Dell!

OUT OF INK!
PAPER'S PINK!

Oooh! AHH!

Lunch break! Lunch break!

Try to eat bologna sandwich...
Get a text on phone! Boss won't leave you alone

(Scumbag! Scumbag!)

Standing in your boss's office!
His ideas all stink! Wants to know what you think!

Tell him how you feel!
Don't try this for real!

Your meeting went well!
Now get out of his office!
(He'll consider your pay raise.)

Make a beeline for the door
It is only 3:04
Someone's calling. It's for you
Take a message, going poo

Someone's paging - beeper's on!
"Leave me be, I'm on the john!"
Banging on adjacent stall!
Make escape; run down the hall

(Files, folders, rolodexes!)
(Product orders! Income taxes!)

"Are you finished?" "I don't know!"
Elevator goes too slow
Thirty emails! Cover blown!
Putting phone in airplane mode!

Fire exit! Take the stairs!
Trip alarm but you don't care!
Siren's sounding! Almost there!
Five more steps until fresh air!

TIRES GONE!
END OF SONG!