"Marigold" lyrics

I've never been on medication
But I think maybe I should
I've learned to balance my emotions
But I don't feel understood
I try to make these words sound beautiful
So you'll listen to me
And I can tell you that I'm just as lost
As I will ever be

I lied to you, I lied to you
Always told you that I wanted this
But I just wanted you
I lied to you, I lied to you
You lit my flame up like a candle
But you burned me out too soon

I'm always dreaming of vacations
But I'm trapped inside my room
Maybe I'll do some meditation
To avoid impending doom
I know that I'm too quiet
Maybe it's because I've seen
Too many things I'm not supposed to know
About reality

I lied to you, I lied to you
Always told you that I wanted this
But I'm not in the mood
I lied to you, I lied to you
I was a fool to ever think
I'd find her universe in you

Spent half my life inside the internet
And half inside my shoes
Keep wondering why shit don't feel better yet
I guess I need more views
Yeah, you can hide behind your keyboard
I'm not doing this for you
I know that most of you are chill
But I'm a God damned human too

I lied to you, I lied to you
Always told you that I wanted this
But I just wanted truth
I lied to you, I lied to you
Made the mistake to diagnose
This marigold before it bloomed