"The Statler Brothers Quiz" lyrics

These are some questions that people ask the most
So we thought we'd answer, try to come as close
To the truth of the matter, whatever the matter is
First some questions, then some answers to the Statler Brothers quiz

Are you all really brothers? Where did you get your name?
Did you all really undress on TV in the rain?
Where can I get your albums? Does Lew ever smile?
Would you listen to a song I wrote? I think it's just your style

No, from a box of tissues
Down to our underwear, try a record store
Yes, but only when he's sleeping
Of course, it never hurts to hear one more

Do your wives ever travel with you on the road?
Did you fall out with old Johnny and does Harold really sing that low?
Whose class was '57? That was my year too
And can I have my picture taken with all four of you?

Sometimes, no, we're not mad at Johnny
Yes and even lower and sometimes out of key
Harold was the kid from '57
Sure, if you can find the other three

Which of you guys are brothers? Remember me from last year?
Why did you all ever let Donnie grow that beard?
Would you do "The Road Hog" and "Flowers on the Wall"?
And how many children do you have in all?

Harold and Don, of course, we remember
To make up for what he's losing on the top
I doubt it and, yes, we always do it
14 and it's probably time to stop

Where are you all from? How much money do you get?
Is Phil always that quiet? He's so nice and kind, I'll bet
Do you still enjoy singing and traveling around?
And hey, just one more question, will you come back to our town?

Virginia, it's none of your business
Don't let his looks deceive you, you should hear him on the bus
Yes, we love what we're doing
And thanks to all of you for asking us
Thanks to all of you from all of us