"Cousin Kevin" lyrics

We're on our own, cousin
All alone, cousin
Let's think of a game to play
Now the grownups have all gone away
You won't be much fun
Being blind, deaf, and dumb
But I've no one to play with today
Do you know how to play hide-and-seek?
To find me it would take you a week
But tied to that chair you won't go anywhere
There's a lot I can do with a freak

How would you feel if I turned on the bath
Ducked your head under and started to laugh
What would you do if I shut you outside
To stand in the rain and catch cold so you die?

I'm the school bully
The classroom cheat
The nastiest play-friend
You ever could meet
I'll stick pins in your fingers
And tread on your feet

We're on our own, cousin
All alone, cousin
Let's think of a game to play
Now the grownups have all gone away
You won't be much fun
Being blind, deaf, and dumb
But I've no one to play with today
Do you know how to play hide-and-seek?
To find me it would take you a week
But tied to that chair you won't go anywhere
There's a lot I can do to the freak

Maybe a cigarette burn on your arm
Would change your expression to one of alarm
Drag you around by a lock of your hair
Or give you a push at the top of the stairs

I'm the school bully
The classroom cheat
The nastiest play-friend
You ever could meet
I'll put glass in your dinner
And spikes in your seat