"How I've Been" lyrics

I just keep getting lost, only thing that comes to mind
When I'm out, what's the cost, what's the reason for my life?
If I quit, am I wrong, am I selfish, is it pride, is it me?
I'm the boss, I'm the worker, I'm that guy, I'm to blame
I'm the one they call when the beats don't hit the same
When I'm down they say I've changed, don't nobody check up on me
Yeah, I'm clean, don't do shit, but I try to think
Maybe I need to medicate
Maybe these drugs will rest my brain, rest my eyes, my mistake
I don't wanna make you feel unsure
Know it's my fault I'm insecure
Taking my bitch into Sephora, she gotta be reassured
Losing my patience as a friend
Losing my will to understand
Losing my will to live my God
Wanna feel better as a man
Mm, wanna feel better as a man
I wanna be seen as good for earth
I wanna be seen as more than worth
I wanna be cool with who I am