"Moisturizing Thing" lyrics

My love gave me a moisturizing thing
Said, "Hey, David. Put this on your skin
It says it's anti-aging, antioxidant too
Go ahead and try it. Let's see what it can do."

Woke up the next morning, and what do I see?
I look like a baby, but I am still me
My honey wakes up, she looks over and screams
That lotion is magic, I look like I'm three

So smooth and so soft, not a wrinkle in sight
My eyes are so big, my skin is so tight
A cute little dimple on my chubby chin
A cute little tongue that goes out and in

I might look like a baby, but inside I'm a man
I think and I talk, I'm still who I am
And when we go out, they ask for ID
It's not always easy when you look like you're three

They act like I'm stupid
It's a fucking cliché
Like I don't understand
Everything that they say

People judge us by the way that we look
Look at the cover, and they don't read the book
They do it to you, and they do it to me
Life isn't easy when you look like you're three
Life isn't easy when you look like you're three