"pros and cons" lyrics

Lately it's been harder to just get up out of bed
Lay in bed wonderin' about the things you said
Honestly don't think that we'll ever understand
Gave you everything I could, cut off both my hands

If you asked me I'd give anything
And I already did, I sacrificed it all
Tell me the truth
Did you love me or just the idea of what I could mean for you?

No sense in hiding, I'm finding it's harder to lie to myself
I killed off my blood like a parasite, now I'm trying to forgive her lie
I need my own forgiveness with all that I witnessed I take it one day at a time
Everything's at stake when it's my life on the line

If you asked me I'd give anything
And I already did, I sacrificed it all
Tell me the truth
Did you love me or just the idea of what I could mean for you?

That's how it goes, one of the doors
Life's not easy to pick up, always on the ropes
Thunder, battle something else tonight
Trying not to [?]
I'm not the empathetic type
And I know you're a cheater, liar, deceiver
Painting a picture of sin, it's burned now
When it's all said and done
I don't care that you're gone
[?]
Just move on