"Freddy Krueger vs Wolverine" lyrics

[Intro:]
Epic rap battles of history!
Wolverine!
Versus!
Freddy Krueger!
Begin!

1, 2 Freddy's coming for you
3, 4 better lock your, lock your, lock your, lock your

[Freddy Krueger:]
Welcome to primetime, bitch
Better stay awake like a meth head
Spread red on your bed spread
'Til you're lying there on your deathbed
You got a healing factor?
I got a kill bitches on the ceiling factor
Under that mask, you're a singer-slash-actor
Under my skin I'm a slasher-slash-slasher
Bitch! I come from Wes Craven's twisted mind
You come from comic books that kids get when they're well-behaved at Christmas time
Flock of Seagulls called, they want their hairstyle returned
And that wasn't even my main diss, it was just a side-burn!

[Wolverine:]
Nice glove, bub, but I'm real from bones to teeth
That claw's like a strap-on; there's a pussy underneath
Don't sleep? That's all you got for me?
Could defeat your ass with a cup of tea
I been to hell and back and whooped Satan's ass
You got beat by a Nancy on Elm Street
You wanna talk about burns, mac?
The PTA turned your face into Deadpool's ballsack
Wrapped in a Where's Waldo sweater
Jason can't talk and he rocks the mic better!
So step into my catnap, see if you can hack that
Better hang on to your whack hat
'Cause your worst nightmare ain't Hugh Jack-shit
Compared to the least of my Weapon-X flashbacks!
I'm the adamantium champion, X-Man
You'll only ever be half of Edward Scissorhands!
So don't get me more pissed, chump
I'll take your whole franchise out with a fist bump!

[Freddy Krueger:]
Look at the size of your body
How could I possibly think I'm in trouble?
I can't tell the difference between your action figure
And your stunt double!
What's the matter? You look tired, eh?
I'll be in your bed tonight, unlike Jean Grey!
As for me? I'm a chick magnet
Some heavy metal bitches are real attracted
What the fuck is a wolverine, some kind of an angry beaver?
I was more intimidated by a tiny Canadian
The first time I saw Justin Bieber!

[Wolverine:]
That verse stung, bub, but I've already recovered
I'll call you tomorrow morning if I need my toast buttered
I ain't got time for this, saving the world, what qualities do you bring?
You're a pedophile from the Midwest, at least R. Kelly could sing
So you've got the wrong room, if you're looking for fear
Only thing scares me is a fridge with no beer
That face tells me you've met your match
So come back if you've got another itch to scratch

[Outro:]
Who won?
Who's next?
You decide!
Eeeeeeeepic... rap. Battles... of history!