"Special" lyrics

It rained for the whole month, I slept in my moms bed
I got a new haircut, nobody noticed
Stopped wearing a seat belt and planning ahead
I got high for the first time, then got high again

Kept my hand on the bible, just like a hot stove
Curiosity kills me, I've just gotta know
Do you think I'm pretty? Do I come off as cold?
And who the fuck keeps moving the goalposts?

Too much of a good thing is still bad, it's been six years, why am I still sad?
How am I less than the sum of my parts, working twice as hard to get half as far?

I've got nowhere to put it down, I've got no one to talk to
I'll never get to be anybody else, "wherever you go you take yourself with you"
There will always be someone worse and there will always be someone better
Everybody hurts, but the hardest part is knowing your suffering doesn't make you special

I forgave all my exes and forgot how to sing
Is my pain the only reason that I'm remotely interesting?
April showers bring in the flood
Killed my ego and I'm still not clean of the blood

He got a new girlfriend, she looks nothing like me
I'm still pissed at my body for not staying sixteen
I wish that I were dumber, fuck-ably naive
I'm so sick and tired of always being comic relief

Too much of a good thing is still bad, it's been six years, why am I still sad?
How am I less than the sum of my parts, working twice as hard to get half as far?

I've got nowhere to put it down, I've got no one to talk to
I'll never get to be anybody else, "wherever you go you take yourself with you"
There will always be someone worse and there will always be someone better
Everybody hurts, but the hardest part is knowing your suffering doesn't make you special