"If You Can't Beat 'Em Join 'Em" lyrics

[Violent J:]
Come here, man, check it out
You know there laughin' at you, man
Fuck 'em, man, you know what I'm sayin'?
Come down here, man
And join the carnival, man

[Shaggy 2 Dope:]
Gangstas bangin', nuts straight hangin'
Freakazoid baseheads sparin' changin'
Homeless hobos pushin' dead bodies in a cart
Uh, listen to the good part
Pigs are outdoors, roamin' the land
Chewin' on somebody's head, I don't understand
It's to much for my nugget to process
So I stop the car, step out, and get undressed
Then climb the trees and kick it with the owls
You don't like that you can suck my balls
Just me and my homeboy Lloyd, you see
Probably can't, nobody can see him but me
Lunatics, zombies, and goons
Roaming underneath the seventeen moons
Of Delray, Hell ray suicide poison
Can't beat 'em, fuck it, I might as well join 'em

[Violent J:]
Dee dum dee dum dee
Dum dee dum dee dum dee
Dum dee dum dee dum dee
Dum dee dum dee dum (Detroit)
Dum dee dum dee dum dee
Dum dee dum dee dum dee
Dum dee dum dee dum dee
Dum diddy dum diddy dum dum dee (Fuck off, man!)
Dum dee dum dee dum dee
Dum dee dum dee dum dee
Dum dee dum dee dum dee
Dum- If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!

[Shaggy 2 Dope:]
Hey! Bitch boy, were the fuck are you goin'?
Don't you know they don't like richies were you goin'?
You don't belong here, I think you best leave
Before I grab you by your chicken neck and squeeze
I take off the sewer caps and dive in
I bring dead chicken boys for my little friend
To snack on, his name is Willaby Rags
"Thanks, you know, you're not a bad guy, Shaggs"
It rains only twice a year around here
The streets are dry because now the sky
Is filled with smog and fog and funk
I finally had it, I'm gonna jump! Aah! (Is he dead?)
No, I bounced, my skin's made of rubber
A toxic waste freak show, motherfucker
And I'm part of the circus show
Can't beat 'em, join 'em, like I did, yo

[Violent J:]
Nobody wants ya, got nowhere to go ([?] baby)
Come down and join up with the carnival show (Alright)
You're addicted to crack and you don't have a back (No back)
Here at the freak show we don't care about that (Come on)
You might have two heads, and you might have ten (You might have ten)
You might have a finger growin' out of your chin (Oh)
Here at the carnival, you can't go wrong (No, baby)
It doesn't it matter if your neck bone's three feet long

[Shaggy 2 Dope (Violent J):]
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em
Hell, just join 'em, motherfucker (If you can't beat 'em, join 'em)
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em
So just join 'em, bitch boy (If you can't beat 'em, join 'em)
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em ("I can't")
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em ("I can't")
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em ("Fuckin', uh")
Just join 'em, mother fuck (If you can't beat 'em, join 'em)
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em ("Hobos")
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em ("Fuckin' wineos")
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em ("Motherfuckin'")
Just join 'em, bitch boy ("Motherfuckin' lunatics, maniacs")
Just join them
'Cause you can't ("Fuckin' psychotic serial slaughters")
Can't beat 'em ("Motherfuckin'")
So just join those motherfuckers ("Kleptopathic fuckin' insane fuckin'")
Can't beat 'em
Just join 'em ("Fuckin' stranglers and shit")
Can't beat 'em
Just join em, bitch boy ("Those-those motherfuckers that be eatin' people and shit after they kill 'em, you know what I'm sayin'? Those motherfuckers that eat, uh, fuckin' horses and shit, and fuckin' them fuckin', those motherfuckers that eat fuckin' dead bodies and shit, them too. And uh, fuckin' transvestites, fuckin', big fuckin' nasty bitches and shit. All those motherfuckers, man. I'm for real man, 'cause I didn't see any shit!")