"the competent horse thief" lyrics

Surprise, I'm not pretending
So committed to the bit that it made me sick
But not fatally
At least, not yet
I have cowered, I have showered
But I won't get wet

I'm just a competent horse thief
Without the benefit of teeth
Another competent horse thief
Without the benefit of teeth

After
After The Fonz
After The Fonz I had no plan B to speak of
Existing
In spite of you
Yeah, I melted, then I belted
But I won't get screwed

I'm just a competent horse thief
Without the benefit of teeth
Another competent horse thief
Without the benefit of teeth

Wait
Wait
The horse has departed before the stable was built
It got on a train despite some barrier issues
And now it lives happily somewhere in the Cotswolds
And keeps to itself
No one would even know it was a horse

Oh, no
He's getting floaters
Who the gods would destroy
They first strike blind but it's a phase
A brief flirtation
I am puzzled, I am muzzled
But I have my pride

I'm just a competent horse thief
Without the benefit of teeth
Another competent horse thief
Without the benefit of teeth
Ahh