"the ceiling is so far away" lyrics

I'm looking up and the ceiling is so far away
I don't believe 'em when they tell me hope's a call away
And now I'm wondering if hell is such an awful place
Because this room is worse than anything I've grown to hate
Lonely fate had to live it
Fell in love with bad decisions
I ain't have no guidance or reminders of the path of wisdom
Maybe it don't exist or maybe I'm stuck here alone because it is what it is
I guess it is what it should be
Need somebody to push me off the highest peak
I'll hide deceit, decide I'm a rookie
In a world full of hate but I despise 'em the most
And I ain't see the sky in weeks yet I've been flying off zo

Looking down and my phone is always dry I hate it
I'm in my head up out the way, they lie in conversations
On rare occasions say they fuck with me until they losing touch with me
And now I'm going off the walls and can't evade it
I'm spiraling and hallucinating my eyelids are losing patience
I'm slipping out conscientiousness while my thoughts degrading
In reality nobody sees what I've been facing
And even if they did I bet no one would ever try to save me