"the one who did it first" lyrics

I don't wanna be friends at all
You won't be here when I fall

I'm just gettin' stoned
Old me would be stoked
I don't fall in love like I did all those years ago
Jaded shes a gem, but shes no lil ghost, I'm all outta hope

But you already know that about me
All these memories surround me
I'm passionate, but baby doll
I learned to numb now I don't feel at all

I don't wanna be friends at all
You won't be here when I fall

Let me talk about my life
While I avoid all conversations
I can't write like back in 21 with all those aspirations
I met every single hero, one had even helped me tour
I had never felt the love that I had felt from friends before

But success and doin' well are not synonymous it's true
I don't ever feel myself unless I'm sittin' close to you
Unless I'm sittin' next to her, the girl that broke my heart
The one who did it first