"Workaround" lyrics

I can leave the train these days
With a different thought on my mind
It feels more like coming home now
Than it did when I was a child
I'm seeing houses in an artificial scenery
Friends are coming back to build a family
And I wonder should I too
Or step back in the train
And keep it a safe place in my head?

Is making me the conscious disregard of things
That make me sad a selfish piece of shit?
The beauty of decay is an invention
Nothing more than a workaround

It's making me uncomfortable
'Cause my memories are filled with holes
Just a few more sunrays of the afterglow are shining through
But not the way they used to
I wanna be close by
'Cause I see the whole world burning
I wanna be close by
'Cause I don't think I'll ever learn it