"Midnight Confessiona" lyrics

It's 12:47 and I should be asleep
But my mind don't let me rest that deep
I got questions with no reply
And memories that won't let me lie
I told everyone I'm fine, smiled through the day
But truth always finds its way at night anyway
This pillow done heard it all
From heartbreak to numbers, I still wanna call
I light a candle, pour a glass
Say I'm done with the past
Then scroll right back to old pictures, old texts
Still lookin' for closure in a place that left

These are my midnight confessions
Thoughts I bury in the day but can't suppress
When the world gets quiet and I'm wide awake
Siftin' through every damn mistake I made
I still miss him, I just don't say it
Still check on friends who let the bond fade quick
Still wonder if I'm hard to love
Or if I just keep choosin' the wrong kind of touch

I practice forgiveness, I ain't mastered yet
Try to move on, but retrace every step
My mind be loud when the lights go low
Tellin' secrets I don't let nobody know
I still rehearse arguments I'll never have
Replay things I should have said, then take 'em back
I talk to God more when I'm hurtin', but even He'd know
I keep some burdens curtained
And I journal in my head, write lines in the dark
Compose apologies that never leave my heart
Ain't no audience for this type of truth
Just me, my regrets, and the ghost of you

These are my midnight confessions
Thoughts I bury in the day but can't suppress
When the world gets quiet and I'm wide awake
Siftin' through every damn mistake I made
I still miss him, I just don't say it
Still check on friends who let the bond fade quick
Still wonder if I'm hard to love
Or if I just keep choosin' the wrong kind of touch

I'm healin' out loud in a room with no ears
Tellin' the truth I've avoided for years
And maybe tomorrow I'll lie again
But tonight, I'm honest with my pen
If the sun heard half the things I said at midnight
It'd never rise for me again
But the moon, the moon keeps all my secrets