"Lost Out Loud" lyrics

I tried to tell 'em I love em and that's when it ended
Thinking back now it just feel so pretend
'Cause I think every action and word that you said
Was a lie in my mind I was tryna mend it

How you gon hide from the people that lead it
How you gon try burn it down when it headed
Somewhere we wanted to go since 11
I thought you was down you was only pretending

Paid for your Ubers to make you an album
Wasn't a hundred I gave you a thousand
Think it was more but as time going on
I just try to forget and forgive what you done

Only time I ever think about it
When I see my friends and they astounded
Asking all these questions I just drown 'em
Out 'cause I just never want the sound in

My head
Lost out loud where I been
Got some thoughts I ain't said
Ringing out in

My head
Lost out loud where I been
Play this loud so I can't
Think about it

I know she really don't love me
The truth can be ugly
But that's just some shit I should face
Crazy they telling you lies right in front of your eyes
But the whole time a smile on they face

Ask why I'm so damn attached
And I can't just step back
I'mma say the design of my brain
I just tell her I'm sleeping
But I ain't gone lie I've been cryin the whole night
While I'm wide awake
Put your knife in my back and you still on attack
So these days I'm just learning to deal with the pain
Had to open my eyes and then after some time
Started telling the difference from real and from fake
I keep shutting down you ain't called in some days
You can call the shit god you can call the shit fate
Kept my tears hidden head down just walking away
When you finding yourself don't get lost in the pain

My head
Lost out loud where I been
Got some thoughts I ain't said
Ringing out in

My head
Lost out loud where I been
Play this loud so I can't
Think about it

My head
Lost out loud where I been
Got some thoughts I ain't said
Ringing out in

My head
Lost out loud where I been
Play this loud so I can't
Think about it