"Pokémon Smash Or Pass" lyrics

[Dan:] Hey there Arin, how you doing?
There's a hot new thing that's brewin'
All the people wanna know how far would you go
With a Pokémon smash or pass, my bro

There's over a thousand for you to choose from
I'm sure if you tried you could maybe find one
That would catch your eye, if the vibe was right
Keep an open mind let's give it a try

[Dan:] Pikachu
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Charizard
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Squirtle
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Spoink?
[Arin:] Oh My God smash!

[Dan:] Ok hold up, do you know what "smash" means
It means you want to cream all in that Pokémon's jeans
So mix in a "pass" and then you won't seem
So desperate to sleep with anything that breathes

[Arin:] Oh, ok I get it
[Dan:] My man, here we go

[Dan:] Tyranitar
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Blastoise
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Politoed
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Cradily
[Arin:] Smash

[Dan:] Ok it really wasn't your level of excitement that was the problem, Arin
It's that you were saying "smash" to everything
[Arin:] Oh ok sorry, I'll think harder about it next time
[Dan:] No problem, here we go
Diglett
[Arin:] ...Smash

[Dan:] Arin... you know what? That's all right
I don't want to come off like I'm being uptight
I was just unaware of your ravenous appetite
To have sex with little creatures with names like Magnemite
[Arin:] Smash

[Dan:] OK, lets approach this again
Just pass on everything that's not an absolute ten
Can you do that for me?
Like if I said Klefki
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Really the fuckin' keys?
[Arin:] Yeah
[Dan:] They're just a bunch of keys!
[Arin:] Smash

[Dan:] Gloom
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Seel
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Muk
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Spheal
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Arin what's the deal?
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] You can't smash deals
[Arin:] Smash

Come on, Dan. Who doesn't like deals?
As far as I'm concerned, I'm just keeping it real

[Dan:] OK, let's go for one last round
Your shocking need to plow never ceases to astound
So let's widen out the circle and see if we have found
The one thing you won't allow to knock your junk around

[Dan:] A chessboard
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] A small gourd
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] A 2014 Honda Accord
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] A green lime
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] A large mime
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] Half a bowling ball and the concept of time
[Arin:] Smash/Smash

[Dan:] An inflatable raft
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] A Boeing aircraft
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] The frozen mustache of former president Taft
[Arin:] Smash
[Dan:] A potato fully loaded that was left and eroded
On a road in South Dakota with a smell that exploded
Like a commode in which a constipated Yoda overflowed it
With his swampy-ass chode so your nose became corroded
[Arin:] Smash

[Dan:] Wow... what about me?
[Arin:] Pass
[Dan:] Awwww