"Wheel Of Misfortune" lyrics
[Dan:] Yo, here we go
I may sound chill but I've never been so excited
Because Arin and I just officially got invited
To the dopest game show ever to grace your TV
We're gonna be chillin' with Vanna, it's Wheel of Fortune baby
The lights go down and the crowd fills the area
My consonant game will blow apart their genitalia
The puzzle is "Titles", no cause for concern
Here I go, spin the wheel
Aw man
[Matt:] Lose a turn
[Dan:] OK, no biggie now it's Arin's time to spin
Wow he got $5,000 that's pretty good for him
[Arin:] Let me see, is there an N?
[Matt:] Why, yes indeed Arin. There are seventeen Ns
[Dan:] All right keep it cool don't get hot under the collar
Arin's only ahead by $85,000
Here's his second spin, $5,000 again
[Arin:] Is there an N?
[Matt:] Yes, there are six more Ns
[Arin:] I'd like to solve the puzzle
[Matt:] OK, let's check
[Arin:] Is it "NnNnnnNNnnnNNnnN?"
[Matt:] That is correct!
[Dan:] All right, Round 2 here we go, clean slate
Take a breath, spin the wheel
[Matt:] Lose a turn
[Dan:] That's great
Tell you what
My hand slipped I'm gonna give it another try
Here we go
[Matt:] Lose a turn
[Dan:] What the fuck, my guy?
I'm going again, here's the spin
[Matt:] Lose a turn
[Dan:] I'm jealous of everybody who is currently in an urn
Just four more spins, this court is not adjourned
[Matt:] Lose a turn, lose a turn
Lose a turn, lose a turn
[Dan:] Oh my fucking god, I need an adult
I'll do anything to end up with a different result
I'm spinning one last time before I tear off my face
Wait, my spin is going way past the "Lose a Turn" space
It's headed for money, oh man this is sick
[Matt:] You've landed on "Get Punched In The Dick"
Oh gosh that's gonna take a while to heal
[Dan:] I'm sorry, let me ask, was that always on the wheel?
[Matt:] Two panels were added when Round 2 began
"Get Punched In The Dick" and "A Trip To Japan"
But you still have to guess, you don't just get the reward
You only get the punches if your letter's on the board
[Dan:] Uh...Q?
[Matt:] There are twenty-three Qs
[Dan:] Oh...
(Brutal punching sounds)
[Matt:] The board is yours Dan, would you like to buy a vowel?
[Dan:] My testicles are absolutely devastated
[Matt:] The board is yours Arin, would you like to buy a vowel?
[Arin:] Actually I'm gonna spin for one more round
[Matt:] Oh it looks like you landed on the "Mystery Spot"
Go and pick up the panel, let's see what you got
It's a million dollars and a car to spare
But wait, it looks like there's another panel under there
[Dan:] Gah!
[Matt:] It's a boat and jet, I'm in disbelief
I can't believe my eyes, another panel's underneath
It's a treasure chest exploding with gold doubloons
And a document from NASA giving you ownership of
The moon
[Dan:] Come on!
[Matt:] And there's one last panel pick it up real quick
It says "If you get this letter you can punch Dan's dick"
[Arin:] Is there a W?
[Matt:] There's 78 Ws!
[Arin:] I'd like solve the puzzle
Is it "QQQWWWAAAQQQWWWAAAHWWWOOOHWWWWAAAHHHWWWWHHHEEEWWWAAAHHHOOO?!"
[Matt:] That's it! You're our biggest winner of all time!
[Dan:] Congratulations, Arin. I wish I'd done better in the game but at least I know my best friend wouldn't ever punch me in the–
[Arin:] I WON!
I may sound chill but I've never been so excited
Because Arin and I just officially got invited
To the dopest game show ever to grace your TV
We're gonna be chillin' with Vanna, it's Wheel of Fortune baby
The lights go down and the crowd fills the area
My consonant game will blow apart their genitalia
The puzzle is "Titles", no cause for concern
Here I go, spin the wheel
Aw man
[Matt:] Lose a turn
[Dan:] OK, no biggie now it's Arin's time to spin
Wow he got $5,000 that's pretty good for him
[Arin:] Let me see, is there an N?
[Matt:] Why, yes indeed Arin. There are seventeen Ns
[Dan:] All right keep it cool don't get hot under the collar
Arin's only ahead by $85,000
Here's his second spin, $5,000 again
[Arin:] Is there an N?
[Matt:] Yes, there are six more Ns
[Arin:] I'd like to solve the puzzle
[Matt:] OK, let's check
[Arin:] Is it "NnNnnnNNnnnNNnnN?"
[Matt:] That is correct!
[Dan:] All right, Round 2 here we go, clean slate
Take a breath, spin the wheel
[Matt:] Lose a turn
[Dan:] That's great
Tell you what
My hand slipped I'm gonna give it another try
Here we go
[Matt:] Lose a turn
[Dan:] What the fuck, my guy?
I'm going again, here's the spin
[Matt:] Lose a turn
[Dan:] I'm jealous of everybody who is currently in an urn
Just four more spins, this court is not adjourned
[Matt:] Lose a turn, lose a turn
Lose a turn, lose a turn
[Dan:] Oh my fucking god, I need an adult
I'll do anything to end up with a different result
I'm spinning one last time before I tear off my face
Wait, my spin is going way past the "Lose a Turn" space
It's headed for money, oh man this is sick
[Matt:] You've landed on "Get Punched In The Dick"
Oh gosh that's gonna take a while to heal
[Dan:] I'm sorry, let me ask, was that always on the wheel?
[Matt:] Two panels were added when Round 2 began
"Get Punched In The Dick" and "A Trip To Japan"
But you still have to guess, you don't just get the reward
You only get the punches if your letter's on the board
[Dan:] Uh...Q?
[Matt:] There are twenty-three Qs
[Dan:] Oh...
(Brutal punching sounds)
[Matt:] The board is yours Dan, would you like to buy a vowel?
[Dan:] My testicles are absolutely devastated
[Matt:] The board is yours Arin, would you like to buy a vowel?
[Arin:] Actually I'm gonna spin for one more round
[Matt:] Oh it looks like you landed on the "Mystery Spot"
Go and pick up the panel, let's see what you got
It's a million dollars and a car to spare
But wait, it looks like there's another panel under there
[Dan:] Gah!
[Matt:] It's a boat and jet, I'm in disbelief
I can't believe my eyes, another panel's underneath
It's a treasure chest exploding with gold doubloons
And a document from NASA giving you ownership of
The moon
[Dan:] Come on!
[Matt:] And there's one last panel pick it up real quick
It says "If you get this letter you can punch Dan's dick"
[Arin:] Is there a W?
[Matt:] There's 78 Ws!
[Arin:] I'd like solve the puzzle
Is it "QQQWWWAAAQQQWWWAAAHWWWOOOHWWWWAAAHHHWWWWHHHEEEWWWAAAHHHOOO?!"
[Matt:] That's it! You're our biggest winner of all time!
[Dan:] Congratulations, Arin. I wish I'd done better in the game but at least I know my best friend wouldn't ever punch me in the–
[Arin:] I WON!
