"Lez Be Friends" lyrics

(The Midnight Beast!)
It's the year of the Beast!
You better have a shower before you come out tonight, girls
'Cause you're gonna get dirty
Yeah (Yeah), it's your boy, Stefan
Let's walk!

If a girl won't come 'round (She must be a lesbian)
Or turns me down (She must be a lesbian)
If she don't like me (She must be a lesbian)
I'll let her down lightly (You must be a lesbian)

I'm at a party, I'm a girl machine
I'm gonna have s-sex with them all, if you know what I mean
It's like a sweet sixteen (But the girls are eighteen)
And I can't wait to peel 'em like a tangerine
I'm gonna g-go down on 'em like a submarine
Submarines are fun, hee-hee-hee-hee-hee (I, I, I)
I walk to a hottie and turn on my charm
But before I can start, I hear a rape alarm
It's going—

I can't feel my ears, I think they're bleeding from the—
I can't work out why the girls are screaming
I'm the best-looking boy in the world!
Oh, wait, I bet she likes kissing girls?
I still hear the—
Maybe, if I let her, she would ... me with a—
I can't work out why the girls don't fancy me
I'm the best-looking boy in sight!
No, hang on, I bet you like boobies, right?

If a girl won't come 'round (She must be a lesbian)
Or turns me down (She must be a lesbian)
If she don't like me (She must be a lesbian)
I'll let her down lightly (Oh, you must be a lesbian)
If a girl won't kiss (She's taking the piss)
Or get down with this (I can't believe this)
If she doesn't fancy me (Way-oh)
She must bat for the other team (She's a lesbian)

Take two, it's my rapping debut—
I'm having trouble trying to find a better girl to pursue
I'm like a fire truck
What, full of muscly guys?
I meant a pun where I'd compare the hose to my ... size (Oh)
And then I see her, and I start feeling sick (Bleurgh)
I say, "My name is Pogo, you wanna jump on my stick?" (Boing!)
I woo her with my words, ask if I can poke 'er face
She doesn't see the funny side, and sprays my face with mace
It's going—

I can't feel my eyes, I think they're bleeding from the—
I can't work out why the girl is screaming
I'm the best-looking boy in the world!
Oh, wait, unless she likes kissing girls?
I still feel the—
Maybe, she could ... me up my ... with a—
I can't work out why the girls don't fancy me
I'm the best-looking boy in sight!
Holy smokes, I bet she likes boobies, right?

If a girl won't come 'round (She must be a lesbian)
Or turns me down (She must be a lesbian)
If she don't like me (She must be a lesbian)
I'll let her down lightly (She must be a lesbian)
If a girl won't kiss (She's taking the piss)
Or get down with this (I can't believe this)
If she don't give me the eye (Way-oh)
She must drive on the other side (She's a lesbian)

That girl, she must be a lesbian
T-t-tha-tha-that girl, she must be a lesbian
That, tha-that, that girl, she must be a lesbian
Tha-tha-that girl, she must— (She's a lesbian)

It-it-it's your birthday!
You go, girl!
What's your name?
I like your... Shoes

We are two boys, and we're looking for two girls
They are two girls, let's talk to the girls
How are you? What's your name?
I try to talk, but I just came
In my pants, I am sad
Chatting up girls is really rad

She won't come 'round (She must be a lesbian)
And turns me down (She must be a lesbian)
If she don't like me (She must be a lesbian)
I'll let her down lightly (Uh, are you a lesbian?)
If a girl can act (She must be a thespian)
Is that right? (Yeah) (She must be a thespian)
If she doesn't fancy me (Way-oh)
She must bat for the other team (She's a lesbian)

That girl, she must be a lesbian (She's a lesbian)
That girl, she must be a lesbian (She's a lesbian)
That girl, she must be a lesbian (A lesbian, yeah)
That girl, she must— (She's a lesbian)

Les-Lesbian, she's a—
That girl, she must be a lesbian
She's a lesbian
Les-Lesbian, she's a—
That girl, she must be a lesbian
She's a lesbian